When you give advice, you are typically doing what is easiest to do, to get your thoughts across and perhaps feel good about yourself.  Most of the time, you will be far more effective by situationally playing a more effective role. Indeed, you will be more effective offering your advice as constructive feedback relative to their vision of success or skills or specific role.  This is especially true if you are the manager over people  to whom you are giving this advice.

Why?  When you advise in a conversation, you basically are giving them a choice to listen to it or not, but often times it appears more like a command (if you know what's good for you…) .   Additionally, often you give them impression, they are not as smart or experienced as you.  Not always most effective and in fact, sometimes counter-productive.  Also,  you may be perceived as stroking your own ego which is especially true for those with a defensive natural tendency or an overly certain, dogmatic tendency.   In addition, if you are not, by nature, the most warm and empathetic person but you have no problems holding people accountable, you may frequently be perceived as harsh (whether you intend it or not)  thus having a counter-productive impact. 

There are more effective ways to give your opinion and to help others perform at their best.  In following discussions, we'll deal with how best to shift roles situationally and then what some of the challenges are in doing so (based on who you are)…